The Beginning of my Journey

I've struggled with weight my entire life.  I can't look back and find a picture where I wasn't chubby. Chubby might be cute when you're two, but not so cute when you're 35.  Many times in my life I've wanted to change this path I was on, but didn't quite know how to do so.  I've joined Weight Watchers at LEAST 10 times.  I was semi successful with Weight Watchers my senior year in high school.  I lost maybe 20 pounds.  I thought I was fat then...hahahaha! Here's a pic of my my second year of college.  I was almost a "looker"...hehehe.

Glamour Shot made in 1993


There was one other time in my adult life when I was successful at losing weight.  The day I found out I was pregnant with Joseph ( 180 pounds-down from 230/235).  I achieved that goal by walking 3 miles EVERY day/7X a week and attending WW. 

Life has a way of taking over, doesn't it???  So FIVE kids later (two sets of twins) I found myself at the heaviest point in my life at 285.6 in 2010.  That day (October 31, 2010) was my breaking point. This came after an extremely frustrating and embarrassing experience in July of that year.  I went to an amusement park with my husband and two friends of ours.  I couldn't fit on SEVERAL of the rides.  One of them I had to get off of in front of hundreds of people.  One of them I had to switch seats to the "special" seat and I was mortified.  I couldn't even enjoy the ride.  Breathy after climbing just a few stairs, feeling guilty after every meal, desperate, sad, disconnected from life.  I knew I needed a change.  Something HAD to change. 

 Leslie Raper was an acquaintance from church.  She had mentioned in passing that she would like to help me in any way.  She was a personal trainer and fitness coach.  So I called.  Making that phone call was one of the hardest things I've ever done.  How could someone want change so badly but be so resistant?  I cried at most workouts for the first few months.  In fact, the first six months nothing much changed, on that outside at least.  However, God was working deep within me by His Spirit to break MY will and to help me see my ultimate need for His Salvation.  This has been a huge spiritual battle.  I have to deny myself, take up my cross and follow Him daily.  After I begin to really submit, humble myself and surrender myself to the process the weight began to drop.  This has been a slow process, but a lyric from one of my favorite songs says "If it comes too quick I may not appreciate it.  Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?".  The desert of my obesity is far behind me and I'm pressing onto the "promised land". 

Thanks for being a part of this journey!!!


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