My Anniversary

Today is the two year anniversary of my day of reckoning.  

October 31, 2010 the scales tipped at 285.6.  My heart was crushed and I was desperate.  The reflection in the mirror showed a woman who had lost all control and was trying to hide behind this mask of fat she had created.  

Today I can fit into ONE leg of those jeans, those jeans that were size 28.  Yesterday I wore my brand new 14's ;-).  I'm almost to the point to where I can shop in a "normal" store.  Oh for the day when I don't have a letter attached to my size or have to pay a few dollars extra because I'm considered "plus".  I digress....

Today I'm going to be POSITIVE.  I'm gonna brag on God.  I'm gonna brag on myself.  I'm gonna brag on my family.  I'm gonna brag on Leslie Raper (my friend and trainer). Today is a day of celebration and joy.  I will revel in two years of crying, struggling, learning, growing and changing.  730 days of ups and downs, relapses and progress, lifting, sweating, running, stretching, swinging, lunging, and pressing.  That's what today is about.  Two revolutions around the sun while I cried, prayed, memorized, blogged, talked, shared, hoped, dreamed of relief, release, freedom.

I've been vulnerable, honest and transparent in this blog.  Continuing to do so is crucial for my further success.  You see, this journey isn't over.  I would like to be 140-150 pounds.  Today the scales revealed..... drum-roll please............the number 186.  If you'll indulge me the .4 pounds, that is a loss of.....

pounds!!!  Isn't God good???

  So what does 100 pounds of fat look like?  Here's a gross disgusting picture for you.

No folks, those aren't mandarin oranges....hehehehe.  Sheesh, that's a LOT of fat!  I'm so glad to be rid of that excess grossness.  Please hear me though, there is still flab, extra skin, cellulite, wrinkles, dimples, and stretch marks.  However, I'm healthier, more free, happier, more confident and that's worth ALL of the other.

Thanks for sharing this journey with me.  Thanks for encouraging comments, words and thoughts and prayers.  Have a good day friends.  Celebrate YOUR accomplishment today, whatever it might be, no matter how BIG or SMALL!!!  Today is OUR day ;-)  Oh and I'm still hoping to have a 100 pound party!

What Other People See

So today I went into Lane Bryant to just browse and maybe try on a dress or two.  My friend Joy was with me.  As I was greeted by the clerk at the front door she said "Have you lost weight?".  I don't even know her name, and I don't consider myself to be a frequent shopper at this store.  However, I was THRILLED that she noticed. 

This is happening more and more frequently these days.  I'm humbled, thrilled, overjoyed and concerned all at the same time.  With so much farther to go I have doubts such as "Will I be able to make it?".    Thoughts often cross my mind as to what will people say as I keep on keeping on this journey.  I pray that helpful encouragement will greet me and not naysayers.  I really would like to lose 50-70 more.  Sheesh...that's another year to year and a half away.  I am having doubts, and so days like today when someone notices are important. 

Each encounter, each opportunity to answer "How much weight have you lost?  How did you do this?"  is unique.  Sometimes I feel completely free to share my journey.  Included in my details are diet, exercise and if appropriate the spiritual aspect of my journey.  Other times it's just a simple response "Diet and exercise".  I have heard countless tells of people who have lost weight, had gastric bypass or lap band surgery.  I've heard all the "coulda, shoulda, woulda's".  People feel free to give me tips, advice and help.  There have been some humorous questions such as "Do you really run?"  or "Do you like to sweat?".  Statements such as "It must be hard to exercise while being so fat." or "How do you do it?"  Truly I really enjoy hearing it all.  Losing weight has given me opportunity to share by speaking AND listening and I'm grateful. 

There was a purchase made today at Lane Bryant.  One I'm thinking of wearing at my 100 pound party...that is IF it fits me then ;-).  Maybe I'll have a chance to say to the clerk in my NEW store, what a blessing it is to get to shop there.  Soon it will be "Bye Bye" Lane Bryant and although your clerks have been kind and your clothes have covered up a multitude of cellulite with contemporary fashion, I won't be sad to part ways. 

Peace out...I'm signing off to try my new recipe-Sugar Snap Pea and Parmesean Risotto.  It will be made with fresh snap peas from our weekly CSA box.